Sunday, October 9, 2016

Badass, Bad, Ass


Badass people do not need introduction. They are awesome by default. They are passionate in their
jobs. They know themselves. They respect others. They see potential. They see possibilities. They do not stick to sameness unless the sameness is also as badass as they are. They don't have impossible in their vocabulary. They won't be heros today, but they are Gods.

With badass people, I don't have to dumb myself down. I can be myself. I can even be a better me. I feel human.

Bad people are not characteristically bad. They are just morons. They are not even good at what they do. They fear even the slightest change. They are insecure. They hang on to legacy practices and technologies. They are slow as f....

It is sad to work these people. It is depressing. You can try and teach them new things or better things but they won't get it. In this case what does not kill you does not make you stronger. It just makes you crazy.

Ass people are characteristically like the bad people, but they have learnt to make noise. They are
oxymorons who impede progress. They make a lot of noise over things that matter most to them. They squash real issues impacting the quality of work just because it does not serve their purpose. They are back stabbers.

They put fear into others. They create self doubt. They do take credit for other's work shamelessly. They withhold information to look like heros. They will excel and fool people into thinking they are more than they really are.

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

A Testers Life

There is a plethora of examples explaining about a Developer's life. It is time to show the QA in the same "light". I am a QA and only some of these are my experiences. Which ones can you relate to?

This is what they think QA are like


This is what we wish QA could be like


My first day on the job - I am introduced.


Product training for QA

I am trying to find my way through SharePoint


It has always been like this. It's not a bug, don't log a ticket for it, the existing QA tell me. (Or maybe they do not want to admit that they missed a big fucking bug.)


This is how Devs are trained about the project.


This is how QAs are trained about the project

I finally get my build to test. It is 5:00 pm Friday

I am not given access to anything, but I am expected to test














Setting up Test Data


Smoke Testing (it usually never detects the fire or smoke till we get to production and a customer reports it. But it sounds good.)


Trying to catch a sporadic bug. Arrrrrgh!! 


I test on multiple environments. (One size does not fit all)


All paths do not lead to the destination


I test with all possible scenarios


I also test on IE. (!!Why are the Mac users sitting next to me!?!.)

With every test, I see bugs crawling towards me.


My bugs got closed without justification.


Dev Team meets me for the first time


One of the thingies is spinning. Dev tells me it met the specification!! (They close my bug)

They tell me it is a great space saving design "users" will be happy using it. (Again it is not a bug)

Dev asks me to redo every step that lead me to find the bug. I do it even though I know it is not relevant.


I reproduce the bug for the developers, the PM, the BA, other Stakeholders. (my keyboard is chaffing)


Testing the same thing over and over really feels like this. Dizzy!! (sorry regression testers.)


I really don't want the tests to Fail. But I have to do the right thing.


PM's reaction when I stop the release and Dev supported my decision

Revamped product looks modern. Team agrees it is modern and we are out of time and budget. What the heck, lets release it hope people won't notice it. 


Expected vs. Actual. 

They ask for MY opinion during retrospective. (My contract is often ended for being honest.)


They hate me for logging bugs and doing my job.




Product is released. I got Fired

They told me it's an edge case, none of our users can do that in Production. (deal with the upcoming law suite bitches!!)

Why you should not delete Tickets

I am old school. Back in the day, logging a ticket was not everybody’s job. Prioritizing and removing tickets from the queue was also handle...